17th December. Girls in frocks

10th November. Hard core Head Ladies

21st November. How evil are you ?

30th November. Where do the fat people hang out ?

21st November. The Veterans Fours Head - another win for Darling

21st November. Head of the River Fours (or 4s Head as everyone calls it)

21st November. The Walk Of Shame award this year goes to................

21st November. Its amazing what you find.........

15th November. God bless America(ns)....

14th November. Two wonderful Theresa's at the boathouse now.......

14th November. So - it appears a Cygnet is useful after all....

14th November. 2 Weddings (maybe...) and a Funeral

5th November. so many boats & outings

25th October. same building - very different clubs

24th October. paparazzi photographer, safety advisor or weirdo ?

24th October. Pairs Head 2006 - "the best (and safest ?)Head on the Thames"

12th October. RIP F14

12th October. speaking out

12th October. Obituary - John Bull

1st October. I do (marry the man with the Porsche)

13th September. will I - wont I

13th September. another amalgamation

7th September. Another 15 Pots for the ladies

7th September. Security - please read and act upon !!

7th September. Winter training starts now......

7th September. A warning to the boys next door

29th August. "David Coombs" still winning

28th August. Captain goes shopping

Off to watch a bit of racing at the Worlds at Dorney, but being a lady, our (newly elected) Captain is diverted by the numerous shopping opportunities offered.

So, she now sports a new JL tech top, and the club will be taking receipt of a brand new Filippi coxless 4 in October / November. This will join its Filippi friends, Teen Spirit 2X/-, Aligator (Ali's 1x) and Lucky Bar Steward (Neil's 1x) in the boat shop. Please note, it is 43.5cm wide, so lay off the pies if you want to go out in it...... Have a look here to get some guidance, are you one of the 5% ???? We may have to produce a list, published on the web site obviously.

So, its not just Cygnet that have a boat buying program, the ladies also have one called "see one - buy one".

Yellow boats are so last season, as we have known for a long time, white and blue are the colours to be seen in.

"serving suggestion"
 

21st August. Oxford redux

Our last Regatta, but one ? - and another BB win @ S2 4+

A cheeky little crew put together for the occasion consisting of Jo (NZ one), Jenny (leaving to go to University in Bangor !! - why ??), Annelise & Ali. Oh, of course, Dave doing all the hard work.

The crew led from the start in both the heat and the final.

In a post race gloating phone call to rival web master Mike, he accused us of cheating on the spurious grounds that the crew had 2 (admittedly) ex. world champions in the boat. Well, at least we have world champions in our club !!

Elsewhere at the same Regatta, lots more Blue & White action was had. Some heats won, some very close finals, but alas, no wins for the S3 & S4 ladies.

A nice touch this year was a Krispy Kreme doughnut stall just after the finish line.

Some of the ladies stayed in a Travel Lodge, Petra did not.

21st August. "ouch ouch ouch"

Ladies left on their own for a few weeks - broken boats all over the place !!

The stories being told about "how" SMG came to be at MAA perched on a rock are almost 2 hard to believe, do you know the true story ? - get in touch.

22nd July. Flat for rent

Michelle, an ex BB lady, has a flat for rent.

Details HERE.

Contact her at: mpalmer1uk "at" yahoo.co.uk

17th July. Club Day

Saturday after outings had the sick, lame and lazy all gather from both clubs for a bit of "mixed" training.

The sensible "new" novices scuttled off to the pub after a glimpse of some of the Cygnet treats in store.

Captain Neil was seen in a cox's seat, not sure about that break in protocol, but no one seemed to mind. Due to his woeful inexperience though, he was driven into the bushes by the more experienced cox's.

Dave had the privilege of having Mike C (100 kilo's of macho oar wielding smelly man) stroke a boat. The crew won, but Dave was seen retching in the bushes after the experience.

The highlight of the day as always was the "Bake Off", where club members bake a cake or something similar for the panel of Captains to judge. The entrants are supposed to be a secret, for obvious reasons, but Katy (Civil Servant) reeled off a list when asked by a casual bystander....... never tell her anything !!

The winner this year was a Cheesecake baked by Theresa. Her topping was much fruitier than you would first imagine by looks alone, the middle section was soft and fulfilling, without being overbearing, and the base was firm and compact, something you really wanted to get your teeth into. The overall effect was something that tickled the senses and made you want to come back for seconds. Her cheesecake was very tasty as well.

The day was finished off by beer and BBQ in the garden - wonderful.
 

17th July. Strictly Come Rowing

6th July. dirty girls

And we are not talking about your minds !!

The changing rooms are now more untidy and smelly than the mens, a first we think. In addition, we suspect due to a chocolate blockage, the kitchen sink is no longer working and is also emitting a rather unpleasant little odour.

On a slightly amusing note (in hindsight) - the pump thing pumped the vile smelly greasy water all over Dave's head as he was doing the boy thing and trying to clear the blockage. At least he has achieved one of his long standing ambitions / fantasies - he had a shower in the ladies changing rooms, however he was fully clothed and in a very distressed state. Ali helpfully laughed her socks off.

Dyna Rod are due to visit.

27th June. tasty, tasty, very very tasty

Sunday was the Civil Service Boathouse Taster Day - once again organised by the Dynamic Duo with assistance from the un-dynamic single (Mr S Pot).

As usual with such events, quite a female bias, but even the boys may have picked up a couple of members (that will double this years recruitment then ? - ed.). Indeed the couple we saw on the tank did not even look like they played the banjo, so a real result.

The Bar Bitch was seen to "remove" a slightly seedy older man carrying a crumpled Tesco carrier bag who was hanging around the tank whilst people were learning to row. We just hope it was not a Cygnet Vice President looking for some committee meeting or something.

There were definitely some good prospects, and also a couple of "lapsed" rowers / scullers keen to start up again.

Another great example of club members (from both clubs) putting in time and effort for the collective good - many thanks to all concerned.
 

27th June. dancing queens

Saturday saw the full might of the organisational capabilities of the Social Sec's unleashed. The Summer party was a great success, going on into the early hours (both dancing and clearing up !).

The garden looked great and the food, sub contracted out to Waitrose (very posh...) was yummy.

Once the effects of the alcohol started to take effect, we saw a couple of the boys doing a "dance" to Baggy Trousers (a Madness classic) followed later by T performing an "aerobics" style routine. Katy was also seen to move about a bit, but in a restrained, Civil Service, leave something to the imagination type of way.

Organising something like this takes a lot more effort and indeed stress than most people realise, so a MASSIVE thank you to Katy & Jenny for the long hours they put in both before, during and indeed after the party.

Pity the Cygnet web master was not around to witness it all, maybe because it was held at the boathouse, it was not felt appropriate for him / her to attend ??????
 

23rd June. they are true BB ladies - one and all

The Novices were out in force last night, two coxed 4's and even then, 2 of them had to stay on the benches.

A little race had been organised with Putney Town. So, with Mike giving us all some last minute tips, off we went.

Now, our boats had never done a racing start, or indeed ever seen a rating above 22. I thinks one or two had not even been out in a four. So off we went, starting from backstops (slightly unorthodox but hey !) and raced 1000m.

Putney Town won by about 2 boat lengths, followed by Annelise's crew and then Dave's crew (having led the other BB crew up until the 3/4 stage).

Then another BB vs BB race, again won by Annelise's crew by a wider margin. Blisters, red faces and aching arms were the order of the day (it was pointed out that legs should ache, not arms...)

Despite Dave's lot feeling very let down at his lack of ability to get the boat to come together and whip the other lot, they still went into the changing room and made him a wonderful birthday cake.

A HUGE thank you from Dave (editors note: its already half eaten....)

21st June. whatever........

The usual high quality cox that looks after the novices was unfortunately not available this weekend, as he was engaged in saving lives in the Feltham area of West London (the person who wrote this has obviously never been to Feltham....)

So, a stand in cox (literally A Cox in one case) was enlisted and a dubious ex Cygnet Captain was taken on as an honorary "coach".

Monday morning, and all these ridiculous e-mails started circulating, a typical example is reproduced below:

Mike C had his scooter / moped thing stolen over the weekend, no connection.
 

21st June. for the Ladies

Our ladies raced at Henley Women's Regatta on Friday.

They got through the qualifying race, then lost by a length to Aberdeen University in the heat, in what turned out to be one of the fastest heats of the day. Everyone was very happy.

A fantastic club achievement, putting together and racing an 8 at HWR - well done.

A selection of photo's and more.

21st June. push not pull

A clutch of Captain type ladies + support (Robin) peddled all the way to Brighton at the weekend in the annual London to Brighton Bike Ride.

Here are some very typical "BBLRC" photo's - showing the ladies doing what they do best.

Any last minute sponsorship, click here.

We like the warning about "If you find this page offensive" at the bottom. To be honest, if the picture on the page is one of our Ladies, then yes, it is quite offensive.

11th June. the latest batch

Novices everywhere this weekend. So many in fact, we had to draft in rent-a-cox in the form of Ali and Tammy to take out enough boats for them. Even Collier has got in on the act, giving them some words of wisdom from the coaching launch on Sunday.

Here is a little video of the Sunday outing, set to music in a nice artful way. Its 46 Meg, so Broadband or Work only we suggest.

One for the more experienced rowers...

** and finally - now worked out how to use the software - the RAW footage **
 

11th June. rowing makes you sweaty

So, if going out after outings, a "full" change of clothes is recommended. Lets hope M&S had her size in stock, otherwise it will have been an interesting Saturday afternoon for a certain committee member....

She could always try here - as recommended by many Cygnets.
 

6th June. SHE is in the front of the boat

This months SHE magazine features our very own ex top 5 BBLRC lady (Annabelle) in a centre spread, along with a supporting cast of lesser athletes (Annelise, Sarah T & Claire).

The management are gutted that there does not appear to be an Annabellism type quote, its all very inspired and well constructed commentary.

However, as SHE magazine are not boaty people, they do say that Annabelle is in the front of the boat, where in fact this seat is occupied by Claire (looking strangely small), with Annabelle actually in the stroke seat.

The full article will be scanned in soon for us all to look at and be proud of.
 

30th May. where ever I lay my knickers - that's my home.

Whilst in the bar munching on a Toffee Crisp (stolen obviously, never paid for) - a co-habitant of a certain BB Lady remarked on the fact that "she left a pair of her knickers on her horse".

No wonder said lady has not yet sampled any of the fine Cygnets on offer.
 

30th May. send 3 and 4 pence - we are going to a dance

Whilst we were conducting Mike C's bi-monthly progress (into the human race) meeting in Nero's, he told us about a couple of little birds (aka fat boys in smelly lycra) telling him stories.

Story 1 - BBLRC are holding a summer garden party when Cygnet are all away at a Regatta. Upon getting him to ask a very obvious question - "err, what time does it start ?" - at about 7pm Mike, he agreed that there should not be a problem....

Story 2 - You have sacked your Olympic level coach. Let's try "where is Donald at the moment ?" - answer, he is on holiday for a couple of weeks. Oh ! - indeed, we seem to have another world class rower helping us as well, her name is Jo.

What's 3 and 4 pence all about ? - click here.

If you can think of any stories about the boys next door, send em in. Obviously, they do not need to be accurate or indeed based on the truth.
 

20th May. TAKE ME - pause - HOME..........

And so they did, in true Cygnet style. The boy novo's winning 3 rounds and then into the final, a length down on the outside of the final bend. Not good thought the massed crowd of supporters by the cake tent. The encouraging cries from the bank (accompanied by many crumbs being spat out at high velocity) as well as Esme's call for the final push (something like "if you've got anything left, give it to me now") stirred the slumbering Soreen inside the boys. The rating picked up and Stu 2Pot stroked like he has never stroked before, powering round the outside of the oppo to win by something like a canvas. The other crew simply had no more to give whilst the Cygnet boys had that extra  special ingredient that in the final analysis gave them the killer edge - a Barnes Bridge Lady in the driving seat !!!!

They are now officially Senior Rowers - congratulations.

Two races - two wins - two pots - zero points. Makes perfect sense to me.

Elsewhere, Nick & Neil also won S2 2-, a good day for our favourite boys in lycra.

18th May. what floats a girls boat

 

The club are debating the need to purchase a new engine for the launch at the moment. Now, we are not sure they grasp the importance of short / long shaft, horsepower rating, 2 stroke vs 4 stroke, remotes, pull / electric start and the weight penalty of each etc etc.

Typical comments:

* Had a quick look at some of your links and they looked like engines to me.

* they all look like engines...some are silver, red or blue but they remain, engines!

By contrast, when the subject of the Summer Garden Party came up, the conversation and associated arm waving was incredibly intense, two particular issues that had to be thrashed out were the type of "fairy" lights to have in the trees, and where should we position the Pimm's stand.

Where did I put that Cygnet membership form.......

14th May. the end of an era for the David Coombes, or just a new beginning ?

The David Coombes, our fine wooden eight that has served the club well for over 24 years, has gone to a new home. He has been raced more times than anyone can remember, from local regatta's to WHoRR. Virtually every novice in Barnes Bridge has learnt to row in him, maybe moaning a bit about his weight (some of us were not convinced he weighed any more than a modern boat...), but always liking his stability once on the water.

He was put up for sale, and 2 days later, an offer was made by Goring Gap BC who took delivery 4 days later. They put him back together, and have already got the poor ole bugger back on the water earning his keep.

Have a look HERE for pictures of the David Coombes in his new home, still on the Thames, but on a slightly calmer part of it.
 

13th May. Two feet and a Canvas

That was all we needed for the Ladies to pick up 18 pots when both Eights won their events today in the Putney Town Regatta.

The WS3 8+ event (2 heats and a final) was a nail biting final as we were slightly behind with about 15 strokes to go, but responded well and rowed through Parrs Priory to win by 2 feet.

The Novice 8 won their heat convincingly against Vesta but were stroke for stroke with American School in the final, always being very (and we mean "very") slightly ahead, but each crew fighting to the absolute bitter end, with blades literally inches apart on several occasions. The "smell the pots" call gave the crew that extra determination, and we took a slightly bigger lead in the last 150 metres or so and won by a canvas. One crew member cried.

The coxes will be thrown in at next weeks Boat Re-Naming ceremony !!

** pictures HERE - courtesy of Matt **
 

11th May. Questions questions questions

Dave will be in the audience of BBC Question Time tonight, see if you can spot him (wearing a BBLRC splash top maybe ?).

If you have any burning topical questions you want him to ask, get them to him ASAP. How do we balance the boat may not be appropriate for this evenings panel.
 

8th May. Borne to win - but not this year

Despite some very close racing, none of our boats won their events on Saturday at Borne Regatta. Back to the ergs then.

Summary:

WS4+ - lost by not actually racing
WS3+ - won their heat by rowing through Sons, but were rowed through in the final by AK, despite an early lead.
WS2+ - close straight final, but lost to Sons.
WN4x - the joker in the pack, lost by a few feet after being rammed by the oppo near the start. A cracking race.

Elsewhere, Cygnet did their now feature "multiple entry" tactic and ended up with a Cygnet on Cygnet (!!) final, won by - Cygnet. The winning boys were Neil and Nick. Well done.

updated:
On Sunday, 6 of our new Ladies took to the water in an 8 with Jo coxing and Poppy + Nick up in the cheap bow seats. Well done and thanks to all the helpers.
 

Have a look at this - plan your drinking, and drink your plan. By slipping in the odd TC, your overall performance is greatly enhanced.

And is now pink.

Mike purchased the new stock of loo roll, and its bright pink. Never let a boy do the shopping.
 

Over the weekend, 7 of our very new novices went out in boats for their (is that correct Rhiannon ??) second outing in fantastic conditions. In addition, another 2 new ladies came along to have a look around and a quick try out, supervised by Claire. One pulled a sub 2 minute 500 metre erg on her first go - are your seats safe.........

Our entries are in for Borne, including a cheeky novice quad with Jo MB, Poppy, Mary and Bryony, as well as 2 coxed 4's.

Jo and Rhiannon took the launch out on Sunday, and surprisingly, came back again, intact. Rhiannon does not drive although we have seen her looking longingly at the Ute.....
 

Elsewhere, the Cygnet Novice 4, coxed by our own Esme, sporting a very expensive looking new hair style (take note Matt, any comment about a ladies hair cut must be a flattering one.....) powered home to win both the heat and the final in convincing style. Pots were won, but alas status was not, as there were only 3 boats in the event.

 

This came in the post.

Well done Katy and all the other helpers.

I bet the lads next door never receive such high accolades.
 

Readers may remember that the club were contacted by a top magazine, SHE, (not to be confused with a similar American SHE mag) who wanted to do a feature on women rowers, and asked if we could supply suitable "role models".

A list with photo's was passed onto them, and Annabelle was chosen as the BBLRC "it" girl. They would have chosen Robin, but she looked too young apparently....(ed. this is actually true, fingers x'd and hope to die)

Photos have been taken with the rest of "her" crew (only in the background obviously) and a full interview done. No bets on her making at least one ridiculous quote.

The following e-mail was subsequently sent to us about the article.

From: xxxxxxx.xxxxxxxxx
Sent: 27 April 2006 14:22
To: Annabelle Hall
Subject: RE: team sports

According to Abi - the picture ed- she wants to make you the main case study because you looked so lovely!

Things change, but that's how it looks so far. take care and thanks again,Sian

Siân Rees

SHE
Deputy Features Editor
72, Broadwick Street
London W1F 9EP
 

Our "novice" Janousek coxed 4, is finally coming home from its refurbishment.

4 Play will be back on its rack (hopefully) by this weekend. It will look like new, well on the outside anyway, but being a shallow ladies club, what's on the inside is a secondary consideration surely.......

So, lets try and keep it looking like new for as long as possible shall we. Do you want to be the first person to put a scratch on it ?????

** NEWS FLASH - She is back on the rack, looking fabulous **
 

For many years, we only had to contend with the one little Dutch person around the boathouse. About 18 months ago, another one snuck in below the radar, or should we say over the radar ?. We also had Bea who had a very long name that may have been Dutch, but it was always a bit unclear. Anyway, she was rubbish so we sent her off to Thames for some remedial rowing lessons.

Now it seems, like buses, another 3 have all turned up at once.

So, in order to make sure we do not offend our guests from mainland Europe, we at the diary have undertaken some research that we feel club members should make themselves familiar with.

Background information. We particularly like the reference to the fact that you should stand when a women enters the room. Boys, take note.

Aussie's beware, you may slip into 2nd place in the ethnic minority league table.
 

The new social secretarts have been busy organising a whole bunch of stuff, including some very nice off site social do's. Then, the "boys from next door" get all funny and moan that we are not holding all social functions in our fantastic bar, therefore putting money into the boathouse pot.

Well, a few simple facts. Our bar is underground, has no river views, it is hard to get too, or more importantly, hard to get home from, it has a darts board (come on - does this sport attract modern woman ??), has a limited range of beverage / snacks and an even more limited range of men......

For a good night out, would you choose this, or these......

These really are (admittedly ex.) members of Cygnet RC.

We do all love our bar, and it is great fun watching the boys sitting around with a Giraffe and fire gazing, but a modern girl needs, well, more really.

(both of these boys have been taken on by BB Ladies and "educated")
 

Whilst the crème of Cygnet oarsmen won a darts match, out on the water, BB Ladies won a Senior 3 Eight event in the Hammersmith Regatta. A tight race by all accounts, but all that evening training paid off as we won by a length.

Well done Caroline, Mary, Robin, Annelise, Steph, Poppy, Emma, Jenny, Kelly.

This brings this seasons wins to 5 already (we have had 4 Head wins with BBLRC composite crews). Not sure how the boys are doing, maybe everyone can ask them when they see them - ta.

Elsewhere, loads of new people were around this weekend with a whole bunch getting out on the water for the first time, and just this morning in the e-post, another 2 interested people (another one from the Netherlands - just what IS going on ????). It is a team effort to bring people into the club, look after them and turn them into fully functioning BB Ladies, so a big thank you to everyone who helps out.

Mike C pulled a few favours and has managed to get the S3 8+ a race in the Hammersmith Regatta.

We give him a lot of grief as he is a rubbish rower, mediocre sculler, has to use L plates at the age of 36, but when it comes to being an effective member of a committee, his skill shines through. Today the Hammersmith Regatta Committee, in a few years, maybe even the Bungalow renovation sub committee, who knows.

In all seriousness - a HUGE thank you to him for helping us out. He has even put his achievements to music and verse here.
 

2 new "Ladies" took to the water on Sunday for their first ever outing. Nanine (Dutch, although not particularly rude) and Katie (Australian, although not from Tasmania, so eyes normal width apart) went out in the Tub. Dave did not feel the urge to pull the "Jerk to inflate" toggle on his lifejacket once. It was only their 3rd session at the club, so a great start. Ross Regatta maybe......
 

It always helps to put riggers on in the right place. So, the one marked 8 should go at stroke, and the one marked 6 should go at, well, 6. If you put them on the other way around, problems may result. Ali Baba now has the riggers in their correct places.

In addition, the "bent" rigger on the Vic Reeves has now been fixed, so the boat is available to use again.
 

12th April. new complaints handling procedure

For some reason, the content of this light hearted diary does seem to occasionally upset people and has indeed, prompted the odd complaint.

Now, as a website, we take our responsibilities very seriously, so we have instigated a single point of contact for all web site related complaints. Using this new single point of contact will enable us to deal with your comments / suggestions / complaints in a more efficient manner.

So with immediate effect, all comments should be sent to the new dedicated e-mail address HERE.

No correspondence will be entered into and our decision is final.

12th April. what type of ladies do you think we are ??

The webmaster was just doing a bit of maintenance on the site today, and found some statistics on the hosting companies control panel.

It tells us where people are referred from. Now obviously, those lovely boys next door are our top referee's, but in second place are people looking for naked ladies in there 40's......

Below is the actual screen grab to show it is real. This is just today !!

Looking back, other strange "google" searches have led people to us, such as "cox+sinking", not very happy about that one, "how to coxless steer", like we know !! and "naked ladies on boats".

As they say, any publicity is good publicity.

11th April. splish splash - I am taking a bath

Last weekend was the Spring Sculling Camp, with the more adventurous members of the club wandering up to Walton / Weybridge (somewhere West of us anyway) for a couple of days "away from it all".

As is now a tradition, members who can not actually scull themselves take on the role of coach and try and teach others who can not scull, often with very inevitable consequences - splash !

Two of our new members (one not even strictly speaking a member yet, so new is she) turned turtle. The dunking is often followed by shouts of "stand up - stand up" - as the water is only about 2.5 feet deep outside the bungalow, so trying to swim is a futile exercise. Helen however had drifted down towards the weir and deeper water when she fell in, so a rescue mission had to be hastily put together.

Luckily, Geordie, in an amazing display of foresight, had purchased (via e-bay of course) a rescue craft and had just finished inflating it when the cry went out. Quick, we need to launch SEA EAGLE he shouted.....



So, untested and manned by a couple of muppets (Geordie and Gledders) - it was sent out. In addition, Stuart was also heading in her direction in the rowing boat, oars flaying everywhere as usual. The story ended happily with Stuart paddling off into the sunset with a wet Barnes Bridge Lady in his arms, whilst Geordie and Gledders struggled home with the scull in tow.

Various pictures have been taken, but all by people still at the bungalow, so we will have to wait.

Elsewhere, a couple of boats went out from base and had some excellent rowing, looking good for the regatta season.

Finally, the website is still generating complaints from our (non club) readers. Is this good or bad - who knows.

3rd April. old fart

Theresa (Ex Captain & Current Madam Chairlady) and her current boyfriend, Mike C (ex Captain and scooter owner) have just been on another all expenses paid (by Mike) holiday, X country ski-ing in Norway.

Here is a lovely picture of Mike.

The picture below was taken in 2001 - same jacket, and we suspect, same underwear and socks......

3rd March. wet n windy

Not another Annabelle story, do not worry, although she does feature in a bit part role in this weekends activities.

This weekend saw all the main weather types represented, often in very quick succession. The age old problem of "what does a lady wear" was even more of a problem as a result. Windproof, waterproof, just plain warm ??? - maybe all 3 just in case.

A couple of 8's ventured out and had what can only be described as "cracking outings" with square blade rowing and perfectly sat boats the order of the day(s). On Sunday, they even organised a little "side by side" with a handsome Cygnet coxless (ouch...) 4. Boys being boys though, they had to show their Alpha Male chest beating superiority by taking the lead, getting very sweaty and red faced as a result.

Peter L had to bend Dave over the kitchen sink on Saturday and give him some serious back slaps. This was not an Orion RC initiation ceremony, but a technique designed to dislodge the large lump of apple from Dave's throat that was making him turn blue. The 3rd slap did the job - luckily, as after 5, you have to resort to the Heimlich Manoeuvre, very intimate....

Safety tip of the weekend, if boating in a Pair, do not allow Bow to get in first, as when the stream takes the bows out, they have no way of getting them back in again, as their blade is on the land side. So, what happens (as demonstrated very eloquently by Annabelle) - is the boat just swings out and pivots 180 degrees with the bow person on their own, with just one blade, looking very very scared, in the middle of the river. Now as any one will tell you, the only sure fire way to stop a boat tipping over is to have at least one blade sticking out either side...... She was lucky this time, made the rest of us laugh. There is a reason why we always say "bow side holding - stroke side in" when boating bows to the Bridge.......

Sunday was The Boat Race - won easily by Oxford. The boathouse was heaving with members and guests. Bar Mistress did a great job getting the place all stocked up and serving the punters with a cheery smile. Various snacks were served, nicely warmed in the oven, and in one instance, nicely basted in crud from the floor when a whole tray of sausage rolls fell on it. Luckily, no one saw it happen (so they thought) - so they were all scooped up and arranged nicely back on the serving dish. Just as well Miss Mop Marj had cleaned the floor the day previously.

2 of our newest recruits (Eve and Eva - I know I know, its very confusing) stepped into a boat for the first time on Sunday. They had all 8 rowing for a lot of the time, and the cox never felt the urge to set of the life jacket once, always a result. Congratulations, we have about 8 others who are also coming up to the "first outing" stage.

With the supposedly nicer evenings coming along, there are lots of night time rowing sessions planned. Now, obviously, it gets dark at night, so lights are an absolute must, even if you think you will be back before true darkness sets in. Also, try and wear bright clothing, or even reflective clothing, especially bow and cox.
Also, you must be sensitive to others feelings and not rub peoples noses in it. You know what I mean, the poor little Cygnet darlings are not allowed out at night, its a bit scary for them, so no winding them up and coming back all euphoric, extolling the virtues of rowing in perfect calm conditions, under a romantic moon, listening to the sounds of the night whilst you let all your troubles ebb away as you glide gracefully along. Its such a serious issue, they have a POLICY on it. Its "hazardous" apparently.

Sounds slightly better than an erg session though ??????

Oh, and I hear Steph is coming back in a couple of weeks.
 

3rd March. another win Darling

Jackie Darling, the person not the boat, has won yet another Head Race (yawn yawn) - this time the Vet 8's - Women's Veteran D category. She had a bit of help from various lesser clubs.

2 weeks previously, Jackie (and Ali) also helped power an 8 in the Womens HoRR to victory, again with some help from a few odds n bods.

Photos of the Vets Head crew are here.

The 2 smug looking Ladies on the right are Ali & Jackie @ the Womens HoRR Prizegiving ceremony. That nice trendy yellow White Stuff top worn by Ali actually belongs to Dave - thief !!

So, 4 wins for BBLRC this season already.

26th March. will you ?????

Ian (Geordie) has asked T to marry him, so congratulations to them both.

She said yes of course.

No doubt he will, as we speak, be scouring E-Bay to get himself a new suit.
 

26th March. BB ladies floated many a mans boat

So much to write about, maybe get yourself a coffee and come back and settle down for a few minutes.

The "early birds" arriving for a 07:30 outing (did anyone actually remember asking Annelise to be in charge of organising outings ???) were getting a bit tetchy and feeling a bit put out when they found every room in the boathouse filled with sleeping men from all over Europe and the UK. As usual in these situations, the problem was referred to a cox to deal with, who kicked a few of them and shouted "get upanzee - get upanzee" in his best Basil Faulty voice. Seemed to work, but the Scots and the Durham lads looked confused.

A meeting was called with their leaders and they were informed in a loud, slow voice "everyone   must   get   up   now   and   the   kitchen   must   be   cleared   of   all   food   by   9am".

An 8 with a coaching launch went out and came back again. When asked if they wanted to stay out a bit longer, they all shouted with one voice "we need to get back and make sandwiches".

Because - today was "The Tideway Cake & Tea Festival II". Not only that, over 3,000 men in skimpy all-in-ones would be on display and would all need a bit of refreshment after burning off huge amounts of testosterone.

The BBLRC Emergency Catering Plan was put into operation. Burko Boilers were plugged in, home made buns were put out and a fine spread of goodies assembled and arranged on the hard.

This years Head of Catering was Katy. A steady trade was had up to and during the race, but post race, it went nuclear. The opposition (Emanuel School) put up a brave fight, but we knew we had it in the bag when they came over and asked if they could buy some of our rolls from us, as they had run out. Soon after, their shutters came down and we went on to take the chequered flag.

As always, a great number of people helped out in a great many ways, so thank you to everyone.

A few individuals also deserve a special mention.
Firstly, Katy. Not only was she "nominally" in charge, but she also manned the BBQ Bacon Buttie production facility from shutters up to shutters down. For her hard work, she took on the aroma of her product. She tells us she got a seat on the train home.
Elle seemed to be on permanent duty, looking like a St Tropez model with her "spec savers" sunnies. The low rise jeans caused a few heart rates to go up a tad, funny how people always asked for items stored behind her on the floor.
Annelise (and son) and Carolyn also seemed to be a permanent fixture, dishing out tea and cake all day, with "son" very keen on taking peoples money.
Theresa cleaned the BBQ and ended up with grease all over her and everything she touched. Job well done, no one was seen bent over groaning after eating the bacon butties.

We are sure there were many more "hero's" on the day, so sorry if you are not named individually.

The Boathouse had 46 mens' 8s to look after and get on the water. Just to complicate matters, another 11 turned up unannounced (we know who they are...). Luckily, we had a very talented team looking after them, led by Tammy. Poppy spent most of her time mincing around with a clipboard, Tammy spent most of her time bossing people around, and Annabelle spent most of her time standing on the same spot chatting to her mates, but wearing wellies to give the impression she was working. Alan Cox fretted a lot.

Quote of the day goes to Tammy "I wouldn't mind coxing a Head Race, but I think I would run out of things to say !" - only if the Head Race was extended to Tilbury Docks we think......

Couple of Photos of the boys.

Big Boys - what is Collier looking at, Cafe Nero ??
Pretty Boys - well, the cox is pretty at least....
Rubbish Boys - just for fun
Why it is called the "Donkey" seat.

Sunday was the much more relaxed Vets Head, with minimal catering input.

It also saw Tess stay in bed for an hour later than her 7 rowing colleagues, luckily Becks binned her sculling outing and hoped in as a sub. As an aside, Becks is also younger, slimmer, a better rower, does not wear funny shoes to Regatta's and knows when to put her clock forward. So, not a bad result all round really J.

Katy can now not stop herself making bacon butties, its becoming an obsession, and many were made for her crew after outings, as well as a few for random visitors who smelt the aroma on her clothes as she came off the water and followed her into the kitchen. Marion turned up with her own pair of marigold gloves and tidied and cleaned the kitchen, a true BBLRC lady.......

On a more formal note, the management know that the 2 big Head Races cause distress and upset to our finely balanced eco system, so thanks to everyone for being so understanding and welcoming to all our visitors.

The Boathouse has earned a bit of cash from boating money and donations from visitors staying over. In addition, lots of money has gone across the bar. BBLRC itself has earned many hundreds from the fantastic catering effort.

This all adds up to better facilities for the Boathouse (ie - new racking for our boats) and better kit for the club, such as new blades etc.

The Boathouse Captain (Dave) says sorry for not always keeping everyone informed about what was going on with visiting crews etc, he will try harder next time, so a HUGE THANKS to everyone.

23rd March. Hamm n Beer

Hammersmith Regatta (the first Tideway regatta of the year) & Fuller's Brewery are pleased to announce a prize quiz to help publicize the event. Full details can be found here. Prizewinners will be drawn on the day of the regatta and contacted shortly afterwards.

If you happen to be sleeping with the Cygnet Web master, I am informed that multiple entries will not be tolerated - apparently ?
 

22nd March. run Simonster run

Simon Blackburn, or Simonster behind is back, is running in the marathon - CLICK HERE to look at his page and sling some cash his way.

Simon coached us last year for many many outings and put in a huge amount of time in making Barnes Bridge Ladies do it faster and in time. He even has his own ex. BBLRC lady at home as a little (very little - ed.) memento.
 

19th March. something for everyone

Book out the next 3 weekends.

Next weekend - the Men's Head of the River on Saturday will need lots of helpers to float the boys boats and feed their little (!!) bellies. Please try and help, its a great day, with over 4000 men on the river. With these odds, even Rhiannon might get lucky. On the Sunday, its the Vets 8 Head, for anyone over the age of 29.

The following weekend, Sunday 2nd April @ 4:35pm, its the Boat Race. Come down and join in the fun. We watch the beginning on TV, all rush upstairs to watch them come past, and then all back down stairs to see the finish. Who is your favourite team, the dashing boys in dark blue ? - or the limp wristed lot in that awful light blue / aquamarine......

Sculling Camp - one of the highlights of our year, will be held over the weekend 8th / 9th April. An information page will be available very soon (when the "boys" send me the files !!!), or look at the posters up in the boathouse. This really is one not to miss.
 

19th March. this weekend we went rowing

We came down the boathouse, went rowing, came back and had a cup of tea.

Censorship - is it a good or bad thing ?? - let us know.

14th March. Is size important ?

3 motorcycles.....
 

HONDA 600 HORNET specification	HONDA SR125 + potted plants specification	KAWASAKI 1000 specification

3 people.....
 

Gledders 5'4 - 65 kg - mid 40's

Ali 5'5 - 62 kg - mid 40's

Mike C 6'3 - 98 kg - mid 30's

Match the motorcycle with the owner, send your answers to the usual address. A prize for the first correct answers.

Barnes Bridge Ladies do it in style...


Cruising through the Nevada desert.
 

12th March. what DO we look like

Saturday saw BBLRC out in force at the Tideway Cake & Tea Festival, also called the Women's Head of the River.

We had 2 full eights out, crew 67 and 113, and a 25% stake in a composite, crew 176 (Ali Elliott @ 7 and Jackie Darling @ 3).

Crew 176 won the Veteran division, so fantastic news. This makes it 3 wins so far this year for crews with BBLRC members in them, as both Ali and Jackie were also in boats that won divisions in the Vet 4's Head (a coxed 4 and a quad respectively).

Crew 67 were racing @ S3 and came home with a time of 22:31, beating 17 other crews.

Crew 113 were racing @ Elite (ho ho - this was due to a late crew change, and the rules state you then have to row at Elite) but were actually an S4 crew and came home with a time of 23:04, beating 19 other S4 crews. They did also beat 5 Elite crews........

Crew 176 were racing @ Vet D and came home with an actual time of 21:33, and an age adjusted time of 20:05. Amusingly for Ali, her crew was actually beaten by an LEH schoolgirls crew (where she is a rowing coach) by 1 second. Just need to pull that little bit harder.....

Loads of photo's to look at, here is a selection:

Crew 67 - Tina

http://www.naturesimages.co.uk/WHD064desti/index_6.htm
http://www.onlyrowingphotos.com/rowinggallery/main.php?g2_view=core.ShowItem&g2_itemId=8921&g2_page=2

Crew 113 - Dave

http://www.naturesimages.co.uk/WHD066desti/index_6.htm
http://www.naturesimages.co.uk/WHD067desti/index.htm
http://www.onlyrowingphotos.com/rowinggallery/main.php?g2_view=core.ShowItem&g2_itemId=8922&g2_page=2

Crew 176 - Composite in a TRC boat

http://www.naturesimages.co.uk/WHD069desti/index_5.htm
http://www.onlyrowingphotos.com/rowinggallery/main.php?g2_view=core.ShowItem&g2_itemId=8923&g2_page=4

In addition to all the racing, the now famous BBLRC Catering Operation, under the steady hands of the newly promoted social secretaries, Katy and Jenny, was doing a roaring trade. So many people helped out by serving and / or bringing cakes etc, it is hard to name them all, but it was particularly nice to see new members and even a not yet joined lady getting stuck in and making the day a success both for us a club, and for all our guests - THANK YOU. One new "lady" just rushed up, handed over 2 freshly baked cakes, still warm in fact, and then dashed off for a prior engagement - as we say, its not just rowing, its more a lifestyle choice.

The evening celebrations were also a big success and a certain young lady was seen becoming very attached to a bucket......

And finally, a big thank you to Mike C for being "Director of Cat Herding" on the day, along with his Cygnet dream(ing) team. Nearly 40 boats were looked after and boated on time. Remember, on Men's Head day, its your turn to "float the boys boats" !!

All photos to the webmistress please so we can post them up.

12th March. do you know who I am !!!!! (actually, as it turned out, no they did not !!)

You have to admire some people, the lengths they go to in order to see a bit of bare BBLRC flesh.....

The Men's* changing rooms had been re-designated as the BBLRC changing rooms for Women's Head day. Everyone was told, and there was even a nice sign on the door saying "boys - please knock first".

So, imagine the surprise on freshly showered ladies faces when following a loud knock, then screams of "do not come in - we are all naked" - a man starts to barge his way in !

Luckily, one lady managed to shoulder the door shut against a very determined man who then started shouting "do you know who I am - I am a vice president of this club and I will not be barred from my own changing room".

So, the door was flung open and the individual was presented with the sight of some prime Southern Hemisphere flesh...

This luckily proved too much for him, and he beat a hasty retreat.

The irony was that actually, no one did know who he was, but a full description was given that has allowed us to draw up a short list of suspects. He was old, had a loud, some said quite pompous voice, white / silver hair, scruffy beard and is often seen shuffling around the boathouse carrying a briefcase.

So, if any of the naked ladies who did not have their backs turned when the door was flung open are reading this, please can you look at the picture below and see if you recognise the culprit.

*note from the Boathouse Captain - ALL boathouse area's are "owned" by the executive, and "used" by the clubs !!

9th March. who is the saddest of them all.....

This diary entry has been removed after a request from a couple of "officials".

 

Be intelligent - be safe.
 

4th March. who lives in a place like this ???

What is the difference between picture A and picture B ????

 

CLEANING FAIRIES	A BUNCH OF PIGS

Click HERE for the answer.

2nd March. where have all the plants gone

You may have noticed that the garden has been "tidied up" by a bunch of willing helpers at the weekend, led by Peter L and his lady wife. Now of course, it does all look a bit barren at the moment, but rest assured, there are plans to put new plants / flowers in.

If you have any views or ideas about the garden, please let us know, as all views are listened too, if not always acted upon....

One other little idea that has been around for a while is to build a form of decking on the top level so we can sit up there and look out at the river. Again, any views, make them known.

And - if you want to be involved in running the Boathouse, you can always put your name down to be an Exec member, notices going up this weekend, with elections on the 19th March.

28th Feb. smoooothly up the slide

GLEDDERS is in dry dock, having a bit of TLC lavished on him.

It will have all its seat wheels changed, as well as a general "tighten up" and clean up.

When it was inspected, a great number of the slides were loose. Now, we are talking "flapping around and moving about" loose. Ladies, now I know traditionally "mechanical" things are the domain of the men folk, but please please tell the resident Boat Boy (his name is the same as the boat to avoid confusion)  if you find something that appears not as it should be.

Once this work is done (by the weekend) - those rowing in it should notice a significant improvement.

For reference purposes, here are some pictures to aid identification.

SLIDES (2 per rower)

WHEELS (one at each corner of the seat - our ones are in Barnes Bridge Blue - obviously...)

22nd Feb. what to do - important, please read

Last weekend, a competitor in the Molesey Veteran Head collapsed in the boat soon after the end of the race with a suspected heart attack.  Although an ambulance was soon on the scene and medical assistance was provided, he sadly died without regaining consciousness. (note: he was only in his 40's).

So, a reminder about what to do if you are faced with a similar situation.

Firstly - if you are on your own and someone collapses with a suspected heart attack, the first thing to do is CALL AN AMBULANCE via 999. There is nothing you can realistically do, even if you are trained in CPR, that will make the persons heart start again. GETTING THE AMBULANCE RUNNING is the best thing you can do for that person.

If you have help, one person should call the ambulance whilst the other people should make the person comfortable, remove them from any other immediate danger and keep talking to them. If anyone is trained in CPR, obviously commence as soon as possible.

Think about the location, and consider sending someone to the main gate for example to direct the ambulance when it arrives.

A couple of things you may or may not know.

Firstly, when you are talking to Ambulance Control, it is very important to answer the questions in the sequence asked. The first thing they will ask is the location. Then they will ask what the main problem is. When you say suspected cardiac arrest / heart attack / they are not breathing, an Ambulance is immediately despatched (if one is available) even though you are still on the line giving further details.

If you state that the person is not breathing, Ambulance Control will offer to talk you through delivering CPR. Depending upon the distance the Ambulance has to travel, it can often arrive whilst you are still on the phone to Ambulance Control / delivering CPR.

Secondly, delivering CPR is not about trying to start the persons heart, it is about pumping oxygenated blood around the system to minimise damage to the brain and vital organs. The Ambulance Crew will deliver a "shock" or "shocks" to the heart with their De-fib / AED, and administer appropriate drugs if required.

Survival from a cardiac arrest in a non-hospital environment depends upon the patient being given immediate effective CPR and "shocking" the patient as soon as possible. It is a real team effort, and by being calm, organised and thinking straight, you can make a big difference.

22nd Feb. its not all rowing you know

Well done to T for completing the Brighton half marathon on Sunday, in some truly awful conditions.

In the Summer, a number of people also do the London to Brighton Bike Ride, contact Peter Leffler if you are interested. Its Sunday 18th June this year.

19th Feb. sculling is the new rowing

9 sculling boats went afloat on Sunday for a little "time trial". Most of the boys cried off, as they had already "had an outing" and might be a little tired..... and they had a meeting to go to. Never let rowing / sculling get in the way of a committee meeting !

Organised by Ali with a little gang of helpers, it all went off without a hitch. The course ran from the Davenham up near Brentford Lock back to the club flagpole.

Due to the complex mix of participants, everyone seemed to win an event, so well done all.

Name:	Time:	Event title:
Bec	0:17:32	Winner - Not Novice event
Ruth & Iain	0:17:33	Winner - Mixed Doubles event
Bryony	0:18:06	Winner - Novice (not novice rower) event
Nad & Marg	0:18:26	Winner - Womens Doubles event
Dave	0:18:28	Winner - Coxed Single event
Huma	0:19:36	Winner - Débutant Big City Banker event
Kelly	0:19:40	Winner - Overseas event
Lynda	0:19:42	Winner - Veteran event
Sarah	0:23:55	Winner - Novice (novice rower) event

And the "GUTTED" trophy must go to Iain Golder for being beaten by a BBLRC lady, despite being helped by Ruth !!!!

And finally - the Cygnet launch broke down and had to be towed back to base by the BBLRC launch, how funny is that !!!

18th Feb. Mike on a Bike

Congratulations to Theresa's latest boyfriend, Mike C - he passed his motorcycle (well, strictly speaking, moped) CBT test today. The B stands for basic.

Have a look at some footage of him here.

Coz he has money, he intends to buy a nice new bike. His eye has fallen on a Honda CBF500 after reading the (real) marketing blurb below....

*Honda CBF500*

Giving you an exhilarating blend of performance and style, the CBF500 gives you the perfect step up from learner motorcycles to the big leagues, this comfortable midsized riding machine (gay) is designed for anyone to enjoy. Whether you're just starting out on your first real motorcycle, or returning to the fold (gay) after a long time away, the CBF500 reassuringly lets you know you've come to the right place at the right time (very gay).

Its high-revving 499cc liquid-cooled dual overhead cam (DOHC) parallel-twin engine provides quick response and strong acceleration for running errands, seeing friends, popping to the local shops for feminine hygiene products and taking sporty rides in the hills (so so camp), while its lightweight and smooth-handling chassis combines with a low seat height to deliver swift, assured handling when you want it, and a smooth ride (oh yes baby...) everywhere you go.

The CBF500 is also available in a special ABS version for people who are slightly older and have just scraped through their CBT. It adds smooth, confidence-inspiring control (gay) of Antilock Brakes to its mix of attractive features. Figure in its wide range of optional accessories, and the compact, easy-to-ride CBF500 adds up to more fun in the saddle (gay) than you ever thought possible.

The CBF500 is an exhilarating motorcycle that you really have to try out and see for yourself.

17th Feb. board on the piste

Our own Huma, after just 2 days of intensive lessons, showing that simply jumping on and pointing down seems to be the way to go, especially when not wearing her contact lenses. 

Can she actually turn ? - what do you think..... 

14th Feb. cross a Dinosaur with a blazer.....

Be careful this Sunday 19th, Cygnet have their AGM (Annual Gathering of Men in blazers).

So, when coming in from your outing, if you are offered sweets from a very old person in a blazer, just smile sweetly and say thank you Mr President, Chairman, Vice President, Deputy Chairman, Honorary Deputy Assistant Vice President (choose one at random) - most of them are quite harmless, and some can be very charming and helpful. One or two have actually rowed, and one, maybe two even, really do support ladies rowing.

11th Feb. all without wires

Coming soon - Wireless 1Meg Broadband @ the Boathouse, as well as many more TV channels (via HomeChoice).

The plan is to have a boathouse laptop that people can use (wirelessly of course) or people can bring their own and "erg n surf" in the comfort of the bar.

We are working out a simple n cheap charging scheme, this will be announced soon, so any views, make them known.

11th Feb. bent and buggered boats

Firstly, when boating / landing, keep the boat out as deep as your wellies allow. The management have produced an aide memoir for this purpose. Please all annotate your personal wellies as per this useful diagram:

APPROXIMATE WATER LEVELS *

* obviously if you are a pie eater, add a couple of inches to the above levels.

Secondly, when being coached whilst stationary, do not be mesmerised by Peters soothing antipodean tones and suddenly find yourself wedged on a rock, or washed up on the beach - alert the sleeping cox and / or do something about it, maybe even take a stroke or two (always ask the cox first, otherwise you may be taken to one side later....).

11th Feb. is she or isn't she, you decide

So, cast your votes below.

29th Jan. all dressed up and no where to go

Elsewhere, Mike C is learning to ride a moped scooter motorbike and is getting very excited, and the club are thinking about getting Wireless Broadband installed at the Boathouse. Mike has the following to say...

It's going to be so cool. I shall ride my Honda CBF500 ABS to Barnes's Caffe Nero for a double mocha-shotta-chino in the morning. Suitably revived I shall log on wirelessly to the boathouse network and check my personal emails. Shortly after I shall connect to IBM and do a very small amount of work before the siren call of the river lures me and I go wobbling up it in a boat which I can barely control. I shall come back for a reviving shower (probably with Imperial Leather) and do a bit more work before being joined by my lifelong boathouse chums (Gledhill, etc.) for evening cocktails (non-alcho for riders) and a quick surf of the Slug. I shall not forget to put a pound in the pot, nor to thank my lucky stars that I'm a member of the most far-sighted rowing club on the Tideway. It's the knowledge economy and we are its workforce. It's going to be so cool.
ONLY £200 a year for all that! :-)

Rowing is such a great sport......

23rd Jan. Silence is golden

The boathouse is becoming a very busy place on the weekends, its great to see. Keep training, races will be upon us very soon.

Quote of the weekend "I think I can finally row !!" - made by a person who has been "rowing" for many years. We will monitor the individual closely.

19th Jan. The only "gay" in the boathouse - maybe not....

16th Jan. Thanks for the feedback !!

When we went to school, colours were called things like Red or Blue, a simple world we lived in.

16th Jan. Oh dear, does she know ?? - do you know ??

15th Jan. Cox'n blonde

13th Jan. New core stability trainer ????

9th Jan. Another year, another hole and a bent fin-g

8th Jan. Another year, another pot or 2, or 3 or......

Did you buy an interesting Christmas present for someone special ? - can you beat this......